Wanted: Fans
by Kang Xiu
Summary: Keisuke has an apartment full of reincarnated (unwanted) seishi, and he decides to get rid of them. Placing an ad on the internet is easy, right? And now people just have to answer it. IMPORTANT NOTICE FOR READERS!! KOK-CHAN MAKE BIG MISTAKE!!!
1. The Ad

Disclaimer: No own, no own, no own!!!  
AN: Do I need an author's note? Oh well. Waen and I will be making appearances in this fic. All the seishi advertise for fans. You won't, however, see Tamahome, Miaka, Hotohori, Tokaki, Subaru, Yui, or Soi because it's male seishi only, and also ones that aren't married, which Hoto, Tama, and Tokaki are. (Although Tokaki doesn't realize he's married.) Oh, and Amiboshi isn't there either, because of, well, me. It's Halloween!! We went trick or treating. And that means lots of sugar to get high on!! I'll never be too old for free sugar highs.  
  
WANTED: FANS  
  
Notice posted on the Internet on Saturday, November the 30th:   
  
Wanted: Fans  
Hopefully in Age Range from 12-25  
1 psycho girl of about 12-15, interested in yo-yos, able to put up with an over-protective partner, willing to live with someone who is going to be making it serious soon, and going to be subjected to worrying over small details concerning her health, comfort, etc.  
1 ambitious girl of 19-24, interested in torture, able to put up with a partner who is usually plotting, willing to be used a bit, and going to be subjected to an expectation to join in animal expiration activities. (People from the ASPCA need not apply)  
1 high-flyin' girl of 16+, interested in levitation, able to put up with the occasional possession, willing to join in with odd rituals, and going to have a man who is not **that** attractive.  
1 wolf-loving girl of 25-34, interested in the moon, able to prepare raw meant dishes, willing to walk her partner, and going to be subjected to howling.  
1 opera-loving girl of 19-20, interested in opera, able to use makeup artistically, willing to have partner who is also interested in men, and going to have to share her partner with 4 feathers and a clam.  
2 ice-and-snow-loving girls, 1 of 14-16, other of 17-20, interested in snakes, able to cook food for ghosts, willing to have a partner who is...dead, and has been for the last 200 years, and going to have a real protective and loving man, also must enjoy horseback riding and archery.  
1 nature-loving girl, age requirements not given, interested in plants, specifically, able to garden well, willing to put up with reminiscences about the mysterious "Suzuno-sama" and going to have to share partner with...vines...  
1 cat-loving girl of 16-20, interested in medicines, able to cook fish well, willing to put up with partner's extreme feelings of guilt regarding inability to save last love interest, also partner's seeming inability to talk, and going to share partner with cat.  
1 math-loving girl of 10-12, interested in odd facts, able to read 3 books a day, willing to put with partner's actions when symbol disappears from location of foot, and going to share partner with...math book.  
1 purple-loving girl of 15-16, interested in makeup and fashion, able to put up with starry-eyes over a certain emperor's name, willing to answer to the name of Kourin (or Miaka), and going to have a strong and loving partner.  
1 fire-loving girl of 15-17, interested in a dark tall guy, able to put up with excessive swearing and drinking, willing to live with a group of bandits, and going to be subjected to rants about milk, women, and both in general.  
1 monk-loving girl of 16-23, interested in magic, able to put up with annoying speech pattern, willing to be surprised by seeing partner disguise himself as someone else, and going to have a man behind a mask. (But he's awful cute without it!)  
1 sane girl of about 17-20, NORMAL FOR THE LORD'S SAKE, no connections to books, no memories of another life, no emotionally traumatizing past, etc.   
1 sunglasses-loving girl of 15, interested in fashion, willing to put up with never seeing partner's eyes, going to share partner with...sunglasses.  
If interested, please come to this address at 1:00 pm, Tuesday the second of October:  
Apartment No. 1234  
Sakura Lane,  
Tokyo Japan  
And ask for a Yuuki Keisuke, who will take all applicants to try out.  
  
TBC...  
  
I have the next chapter all planned out. I don't wanna say much, but Hikitsu, Suboshi, Tasuki, Chichiri, Nuriko, and, of course, Amiboshi, are already taken. I can't ask people who they wanna be paired with, cause that's against ff.n rules, but if you wanna slide me a hint in your review, I'm only too happy. And I must stop saying, "wanna". Somebody's gonna sue me. 


	2. The Applicants

I wish to apologize to: frenchiecangirl. Because Kryssa already asked for Keisuke. And I would like to tell babygxpress that she and Tomite are coming up in the next chapter **nodnod**   
And the Chiriko fangirls are not helping by existing!! AHHH!! There are too many of you! You're killing me!! **self-destructs** Ok, that's getting a little melodramatic. Anyway, here it is:  
  
Three days later, Tuesday, October second...  
  
KoKourin Kou and her sister Waen walked up the flight of stairs to the Yuuki apartment in Tokyo. They were accompanied by KoK's boyfriend, Koutoku Bu. Waen was answering the ad online, applying for No. 6b. Waen was 19, tall, black-haired and moss-eyed, and she had with her two snake-horses (snorses) made of ice.   
"Do you think it's him?" she asked her sister.  
"Of course," the green-haired girl returned, clinging to Koutoku's arm. Suddenly she remarked randomly, "Why is it with our anime selves, you are older than me? I'm fifteen to your nineteen. In real life I'm older."  
"Because," Waen answered simply and unsatisfactorily. Then she added, "I have to be his age."  
"Yeah, how could I forget?"   
"Now, KoK," Koutoku scolded gently, "Waen deserves to be with the man she loves."  
"Sap. Sap. Sa-awwww," she folded as he kissed her.  
Waen pointedly ignored them, and rang the doorbell. A tall young man with blonde-brown hair answered.   
"Moshimoshi? Oh, the ad. Yes, come in." Waen stepped inside and was greeted by the sight of 15 other men, and about that number of girls.  
"Maze?" she questioned the brown-haired girl hanging on the blue-haired monk.  
"Hai! I came as soon as a read the ad. And I was right! It's Chichiri." The masked man took it off and smiled hotly down at Maze, resulting in the chibiness of the authoress.  
"So-ka."  
"You and KoK're invited to the wedding. We're planning one in April."  
"Nyan-nyans for bridesmaids no da!" Chichiri confirmed.  
"A-arigatou."   
"Ne ne ne ne ne neeeeeee!!! Obake-chan!!"   
Waen turned at hearing her sister's nickname for her. "Hai?"  
"Hidemi/Tasuki! Scaaaary!! Tomoko/Suboshi. Scaaaary!!" she said, referring to two of the girls' friends-and-fellow-authoresses.   
"That's not scary, KoK. You're insane, or drunk, or both. They make great couples."  
"Haaaaiiiii, you're right. And I'm neither. I got high on air again."  
"Oh dear."  
"Neeeee, I see one hot eye-patched guy with no hang-ons."  
"KoK," Waen warned the psycho.  
"Nani? It's true..." She then proceeded to push her sister over to the aforementioned personage. "'Kitsu, 'Kitsu, 'Kitsu. This girl is answering your ad. Believe me, she cooks great ghost rice! And besides that, she's freaking obsessed with horses! Trust me, if she ever got separated from Lily for even one day she'd flip! No kidding! Besides which, she's 19 hitting 20, and needs a man in her life! Come on 'Kitsu, you know you wanna!!"   
The eye-patched man blushed. "KoK. You torture me day after day in your evil mind of fanfiction, and now..."  
"'Kitsu. She's so cute! Tell me you could resist that smile!"  
"KoKourin!!" Waen protested.   
KoK ignored her, and continued, "'Kitsu, you've gotta get over Takiko. I mean, you weren't in love with her or anything. It was Tomite-baka!! Come ooooonnnnn!!!"  
"..." they both returned enthusiastically.   
Fed up, the psycho simply pushed Waen into Hikitsu, so that she ended up in the ice-lover's arms. "There," KoK smiled, looking satisfied. "Now. To get back to more important things." Koutoku suddenly found himself with a chibi hanging round his neck like some kind of bizarre necklace.   
"Hi KoK."  
"Hiiiiiiiiiiii!!!"  
Meanwhile, there was another knock at the door. Keisuke opened it to a purple-haired girl of about 16.   
"Don't say a thing. You're answering my ad, No. 10. Right?"  
**nodnod**  
"Thought so. He's inside. But you're going to have competition."  
**nodnod** **evil smirk** **purposeful stride forward**  
"Uh-oh."  
Taira grabbed her plastic lunch tray from its place on her back and went into the fray.   
"Reeal sorry, Lily."  
"What??"  
**whack**  
"GOMEN NASAI!!!!" she yelled to the sky.   
"I'll eat your children!!!!!" came the answer.  
"Oh yeah?"  
"Yeah!"  
"Yeah?"  
"Yeah!"  
"Yeah?"  
"Yeah!"   
"You guys sound kinda like Taka and Miaka," Keisuke remarked.  
"Noooooooo, anything but THAT!!!!" cried Taira.   
Then Maze poked her head around. "Taira?"  
"Yeah?"  
"You did sound like Taka and Miaka."  
"Whaaaaaaaaa!!! Nuriko, comfort me!"  
"....No..."  
"You better!!" Taira beat her bishounen unconscious with the Plastic Lunch Tray of Doom, and then hugged him. "Nuriko, you've taught me so much!! It worked on Tama-baby, after all!"  
**groan**  
Meanwhile, Tomoko and Suboshi were yo-yo-ing random objects.   
"Having fun, love?"  
"Yepyep!!"  
"Good. D'you think you could hit the punch bowl?"  
"Sure. Just a minute..." She sighted down the yo-yo. And then.... "IKU RYUUSEISUI!!!!!!" **BLANG ** Punch spattered all over the room. Suboshi and Tomoko cracked up, giving each other high fives and doubling over with laughter at Keisuke's dismayed face.   
"The punch!"  
"Whahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!" three voices cackled. The two 15-yr-olds turned to stare at Tomo.   
"He's here!"  
"Tomo?"  
"Hai?"  
"Run."  
"NOOO!!!" An outraged Tomo fangirl threw herself in front of him. "You'll never harm Tomo-kins!!"  
Suboshi and Tomoko both fell over anime-style. "...Tomo-kins..."  
Just then, Hidemi and Tasuki walked over. They were deep in conversation, discussing the cost of dogwood trees.   
"So if we spend 80+ yen a year on 10 dogwood trees at 8+ yen a dogwood...."  
"With allowances for trees dying and the added cost of planting..."  
"Not to mention water and nutritional support..."  
"And of course droughts and floods..."  
"And animals..."  
"And vandals..."  
"Don't forget, we'd need someone to look after them while we were away..."  
"Ahh, is it worth it?"  
"I think so."  
"Yeah. It would be beautiful during the summer..."  
"So, you thinking 250 yen?"  
"About that."  
"I say go for it."  
"Ok!"   
They shook hands.  
"Hi...de...mi..."  
"Hai?"  
"What were you talking about?"  
"Whether it was worth investing in dogwoods."  
"I know, but whyyyy??"  
"Because we think that it would make a lovely environment for our children to grow up in."  
"...Oh..."  
"Surprised that the leader of the Leikaku-zan bandits is going in for marriage?"  
"Sorta."  
"Sure as **** I'm surprised!!! I mean, **** it all, Tasuki getting married??"  
"KoK," Koutoku warned gently, "Language..."  
"Bah. When you're high on air you're allowed to swear."  
"I think not."  
"I think so."  
"KoK..."  
"GOMEN NASAIIIIII!!!!!" Koutoku was wearing a chibi necklace again.  
"What did I do to deserve this?"  
"I dunno! Maybe you were extra-good or something?"  
"Sure, sure."  
"Donna kurayami datte Jumon hitotsu de daha-ha-ha!!! Itsumo kibou wa chikara sa uchiageyou hikara no hana!!!"  
"Why is MY girlfriend a psycho and not yours?" Koutoku said wistfully to Hikitsu.  
"She's not-"  
"I KNEW you and Obake-chan would get together!!!! All right, 'Bake-chan, you found your man!!! As a searcher who found her bishi after many years myself, I congratulate you!!"  
"I never said-"  
"Taira! Give me a curtain!"  
"Happy to oblige." The purple-haired girl, who was still carrying a KOed Nuriko, threw her a big floaty purple curtain. The green-haired psycho happily wrapped it around her sister and the stunned ice guardian.   
"There! Always remember, togetherness works!!"  
Muffled protests that came from the clothy bundle were ignored. KoK grinned psychotically, looking like Suboshi's twin sister, and planted a kiss on Koutoku's cheek. He sighed, and returned it. Keisuke went to answer the door, where another applicant stood.   
She was tall, and pretty, and had long silver-blonde hair that went down to her waist. Her smoky gray eyes looked up at him innocently. She was 19. He wasn't sure who she went to.  
"Which ad number are you answering?"  
"13."  
"13" //That was MY ad number! She's my fan. My very first fan!! Ohhh// "Come in."  
"Thank you."  
"Ad number 13 is, well, um, me."  
"You!" She looked delighted. "I'd hoped it was."  
"H-hontou?" //And she's so pretty!!!//  
"Hai. I wanted to say, I fill all the qualifications. With the exception of knowing all about the Shi Jin Ten Chi Sho."  
"Th-that's okay..." **blush**  
"Snap out of it, Keisuke!!"  
"Yeah, just kiss her and tell her you love her already!"  
Two unwelcome helpers, Nuriko and KoK, appeared at his side.  
"Well, wait though."  
"Yeah, you gotta ask her name!"  
"Of course! She's obviously got a lovely one!"  
"Now ask her what it is. Go on!"  
"Um...what's your name?"  
"Kyrssa."  
"It's a beautiful name... ..."  
"Thanks."  
"..."  
"..."  
"KISS ALREADY!!!"  
"Come on, Keisuke, you've got to be a pretty decent kisser!"  
"GO!"  
"FOR!"  
"IT!"  
**bluuuuuush**  
"Keiiiiisukeeee!!"  
**bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuush**  
**shove**  
Nuriko took Keisuke and KoK took Kryssa and they pushed the two's lips together. She and Keisuke were blushing furiously.  
KoK sighed. "About time."  
Then there was...ANOTHER KNOCK AT THE DOOR!!!!!  
  
  
TBC...  
  
More coming, yup! And btw, were some people listening when I said Suboshi and Chichiri were taken? Cause they are. Ok, the people who didn't see themselves with their bishis in this chapter, it's coming in the next. And that's all for today from the fangirl who can get high on air,   
  
KoKourin Kou 


	3. More Applicants and a Seed! No Kidding

More Applicants. Suzaku save us!  
  
Disclaimer: I still own nothing. But darn it all, I want Amiboshi!!!!!!!   
AN: All right, Chiriko people, line up!!! First prize goes to BlueFire, and she gets the actual thing. Next is LanaPanther, in second place, and she gets one of their children. Moo Kawaii Moo, you get a little RoboChiriko. And to RyougazGal, please accept this little Chiriko plushie, signed on its foot by Chiriko himself. Sano and Babygxpress, watch for yourselves!!! Er, yeah, and is Sano a boy or a girl or an it? In this he/she/it's a girl. Apologies if he/she/it is a boy and is offended. I scared even myself in this chapter.   
AND Waen is so ticked off at me for the curtain, I currently am typing with the door to the computer room locked. For protection. Aha, now, let's start.  
  
  
The knock, ah yes, the knock. Keisuke edged over to the door, and opened it.  
"Konninichiwa?"  
"Watashi wa Sano..."  
"Matte, matte, matte," KoK broke in, "I'm seeing grrrreen clothes, I'm seeing seed embrrrroiderrry, and I'm thinking....Tatarrrra?"  
"Hai. Demo, dare wa anata desu ka?"  
"You're seeing green hair, you're seeing a flute, and you're thinking?"  
"Amiboshi?"  
"HAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIII!!!"   
"Ahhhh!!"   
"Soooooooo, you're Tatara's girl, eh? Well, seed boy is lonely. Heck, he needs a distraction from "Su-zu-nooooo". Yeah, you'll be great. Move on, come, come." KoK gently maneuvered the small, delicate, flower-like girl to the corner where Tatara sat by himself, playing with the petals of a large chrysanthemum. He looked up at their approach. Sano nervously flicked some of her pale yellow hair away from her hazel eyes.   
"Konban wa, Tatara-san."   
"Konban wa, ah..."  
"Her name is Sano, seed boy." //Why the HECK is everyone so darn shy? Stupid. They need to assert themselves. They need to feeeeeel the looooove...//  
"Ah, Sano, yes, um, heh."  
//I must MAKE them feeeeel the loooooove!!! I shall speak!!//  
"FEEEEEEEEEL THE LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!!"  
"Ahhhhh!!" Sano jumped, completely freaked out by the fruitcake's yell. She fell backward by mistake, and before she hit the floor Tatara caught her.  
"HAHHHHH!!! You are feeling the looooooove!!!"   
Sano looked up at her, shaking like a frightened rabbit. "Please.... get.... her.... away.... from.... me."  
"Demo....demo..." Koutoku came up behind KoK and gently dragged her away.   
"Must buy sedatives next time I go to the store," he murmured.   
"Doushite, Kou-ai?"  
"...You weren't supposed to hear that..."  
"Doushite, Kou-ai?"  
"......."   
"Want me to knock her out for you, Ami?" Nuriko offered  
"...No...."  
Keisuke sighed. Kyrssa patted him comfortingly on the back. "It's okay, Kei-chan. I'll help you clean up and everything afterwards."  
"Arigatouuuuu!" Keisuke hugged her, practically crying.  
Waen and Hikitsu had given up trying to get out of the curtain and were taking advantage of the situation.   
"You're a good kisser, Hikitsu."  
"Thanks."  
[Insert long kiss here] (AN: This is the OTHER reason I have the door locked. So she can't some in and read over my shoulder and kill me and so on.)  
"Can we have one of those curtains, Taira?" Maze called to the purple-haired girl.   
"With pleasure. They now come in the colour of your choice for a small fee."  
"How much?"  
"A bit of Taira/Nuriko in the next fangirl-insertion piece you write."  
"Kaayy! Can we have a blue one?"  
"Course!"  
"Heh. Little does she know I do not plan on writing a fangirl-insertion fic for a year and 2 weeks. Heh heh heh. Kiss me, Chichiri!" she said dramatically.  
"OK na no da!" said the blue-haired monk, complying.  
Taira threw the curtain around their shoulders, all the while singing. "Kanojo no kokoro wo ZUTAZUTA ni shita YATSU wa kono ore ga yurusanai!"  
Suboshi, hearing the lyrics to Never Get Away, ran over.   
"Never get away - me hazurasu na! Never get away for you! SUKI wo misetara yarerachimau kono destiny!"  
Tomoko jumped up beside him, and joined in. "Never get away - sekai-juu ga! Never get away for you! Teki de mo kamawanai! It's all right - kimi no tame!"  
The three-some continues to sing loudly, until the woman next door sent her teenage daughter over to see what was wrong.  
"EXCUSE ME!" the girl called over the noise.  
"YES?" yelled back Keisuke.  
"COULD YOU PLEASE - "  
"WHAT'D YOU SAY?"  
"I SAID COULD YOU PLEASE - "  
"I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!"  
"COULD YOU PLEASE - NEVER MIND!!"  
"WHAT??"  
"NEVER MIND!"  
"I BEG YOUR PARDON??"  
"AHHHHH!!!"  
"WHAT'S WRONG?"  
"NOTHING!!"  
"HUH????"  
The girl turned to leave the House (or rather, Apartment) of Chaos. Then she saw the boy behind her. He had fluffy brown hair that he had apparently attempted to stuff under a blue furry hat. His eyes shone good humor and kindness. He smiled at her.   
"Konnichiwa. Watashi no namae wa Tomite, or Tan Chamka."  
"Watashi no namae wa Iwanaga Hoshi."  
"Star? That's a pretty name."  
"Thanks."  
"What are you here for? Are you answering an ad?"  
"What?"  
Tomite showed her the printed piece of paper.   
"Which are you?"  
"Me? I'm the ice-loving boy of 16, enjoys archery, likes rice."  
"So you've been dead for the last 200 years?"  
Tomite blushed. "Yes."  
Hoshi laughed. "But in true love, age doesn't matter, ne?"  
Tomite blushed again. "Ne."  
Hikitsu seemed to have detached himself from the curtain (but not Waen) for he suddenly stood beside Tomite, with, of course, the aforementioned female by his other side.  
"Otouto?"  
"Hai, Nii-chan?"  
"Whatever you do, make sure she's sane, ok?"  
"Nii-chan!" Tomite turned an interesting shade of crimson. "I...I..."  
Waen smiled encouragingly at him. "Come on. You shouldn't always be lonely."  
Tomato was now as red as one. (WAIT!! Did I say "Tomato"? I meant Tomite! Yeah, course I did! Uh-huh!)  
Hoshi cocked her head to one side and said shyly, "I can make rice pretty well..."  
"Really?" Tomite managed.  
She nodded. "I'm 15, archery in my hobby, winter is my favorite season."  
"You like the snow a lot?"  
"M-hm! I also like your hat!"  
Tomite flushed. "I...well...I always thought it looked kinda dumb."  
"No!"  
"It makes my head look like a marble!"  
Hikitsu began chuckling softly. Tomite suddenly found the carpet very interesting.   
"Tomite?"  
"Hai?"  
"I don't have a boyfriend."  
"Ahhhhh!" Tomite buried his face in his hands as Hikitsu laughed harder.   
Waen prodded him in the back. "C'mon, hat boy."  
Tomite took a deep breath. "Well, then, would you like to go out with me?"  
A little alarm thingy went off, and a balloon of confetti exploded over his head, little paper hearts sticking in the furriness of his hat. He winced, causing glitter to dislodge itself from his hair and eyebrows and float to the ground. More glitter and stuff fluttered away as Hoshi hugged him.   
"I'd love to! Do you know about the great movie theatre they have here?"  
"No, I didn't. What's showing?"  
Seeming to have suddenly overcome his shyness, Tomite found himself deep in conversation regarding whether it would be better to see Miyazaki's Spirited Away or a remake of Godzilla that would be playing. (YES!! Miyazaki's SA is showing the Harrisburg theatre or somewhere reasonably close!! I'm going to bribe my parents to take me. I wish I had a driver's license. Lucky Tomoko)  
Then he heard a strangled gasp. He turned to see Tomoko and Suboshi crying on each other's shoulders.   
"Noo!"  
"How can it BE?"  
"She betrayed us!"  
"That lovely young girl and that...creature!"  
"I can't BELIEVE it!"  
"It's true, though!"  
"How to live through it?"  
"I know!"  
"It's just horrible!"  
"And we can't kill him or it would destroy her happiness!" (Since when has Suboshi cared about others' happiness? KIDDING!!)   
"We must show her the light!"  
"The poor child!"  
"What is it?" he questioned the green-haired girl observing.  
"Shouka-chan's just answered Tomo's ad." KoK said perfectly calmly.  
Waen frowned. "Since when have you been so quiet?"  
"Kou-ai gave me something nice and I feel very weird."  
"Bokyakuso does wonders for making people forget they're supposed to be insane," the flutist murmured behind his hand. Waen grinned.  
Just then a girl appeared beside Keisuke. Her hair was bright blue, and looked oddly like it was burning. She sighed, and translocated to Chiriko. Saying a few words in Chinese and making an odd gesture in the air, she smiled at the little genius. Who was quite suddenly not a little genius any longer, but an older genius of about 16.   
"Chiriko, ni hao ma? I'm Bluefire."  
Staring, he replied, "I'm in a perfect state of health. And you?"  
"The same. I wanted to know if you've ever heard of the Chinese mage Furusawa Ame, a spellworker of really incredible power."  
"No. Is that the kind of magic you use?"  
"Yep!"  
"Could you tell me more about him? I'd like to learn more."  
"Course I could."  
Thus the genius and the mage began discussing the powers she had.   
And we all know study leads to love!! Remember episode 39???? I'm kidding! That's not going to happen!!   
  
TBC...  
  
I plan on going into more detail on Shouka, Sano, Bluefire and Taira next time. Also, there are still quite a few lonely seishi!! Please r+r to get your free of charge self-insertion now!!   
Oh, gods, I so had writers' block for your part Bluefire! I'm sorry, I'm really sorry! I'll do better for you next chapter! *cries*   
KoK 


	4. Hahahahaha! Short Chapter in Honor of My...

I still own nothing! (No, Waen, of _COURSE_ I'm not writing any more of that fic you hate!) Becki, you have entered! Seishi left: Mitsukake, Nakago, Ashitare, Miboshi. Poor unwanted seishi!!! This is gonna be a short chapter, but I had to post something to celebrate my new account name. This is the VERY LAST TIME I change it, it's not happening again.  
  
  
Tetsuya sat in a corner and pouted. Unlike Keisuke, he had not found a match. He glared when said personage sent him a smug look over Kyrssa's shoulder. He glared, but unfortunately it did not make much of an impression, for his sunglasses ruined the full force of the nasty look. Keisuke just smiled irritatingly. Then the door opened. A lovely girl with silvery hair (Not gray! _SILVER_ There's a difference, ya know) entered. A vision in pale green, a vision to be sure. And she moved in Tetsuya's direction.  
Tetsuya stared. //WOW!!!//  
"'Nichi-wa?"   
"Watashi no namae Becki."  
"Becki...." Tetsuya's eyes crossed of their own accord. Luckily his sunglasses saved him any embarrassment.   
"Anata wa Tetsuya?"  
"H-hai..."  
"II!!!!! Tetsu-ya-chan!"  
"Tetsuya-chan?????" *bluuuuuuush*   
"WILL YOU PEOPLE QUIT BLUSHING???!!!" yelled Nuriko, irritatedly.  
"Nuriko, be quiet. You know you'd rather kiss me than yell at Tetsuya-chan," said Taira. Lily shot her a venomous glare. KoK quietly moved over to where Lily was. The other girl didn't see her. She said softly, "Lily-chan. Anger is bad. Try to feel happiness for her happiness."  
Lily jumped a foot in the air.  
"Ahhhh! KoK!!! Don't SCARE me like that!"  
"Gomen nasai."  
"Anyway, what's wrong with you? Shouldn't you be insane? Like a fangirl?"  
"Fangirl? Insane? That means?"  
"KOK!!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?"  
"Whyya shouting? Nothing's wrong with me..."  
Koutoku came up behind her. "Lil'? She's been brainwashed."  
"WHAT?!!?? Why'd ya do THAT?"  
"I like her this way."  
"But...but...she's no good as a fangirl any more!!"  
"Precisely. Perfect as my future wife. Calm. Sensible. Pacifistic."  
"YOU RUINED HER!!!!"  
"Lily, it's okay. I don't mind. I'm happy."  
"But you're no good anymore!!"  
"But I'm the way Kou-ai wants me. That's the way I wanna be."  
"Is she getting on anybody else's nerves???" demanded Nuriko.  
"Yeah, actually," said about half the people in the room - the people who weren't kissing other people.   
Nuriko rolled his eyes.   
Chichiri and Maze grinned at everyone else, and started out the door.  
"Where ya going?" called Keisuke.  
"Home. Not enough privacy here." Maze winked. Chichiri blushed. Nuriko looked annoyed. The pair sidled out.   
"Aren't you supposed to wait till you're married?" Bluefire yelled.  
"What do you mean?" Chiriko asked innocently.  
Chichiri and Maze ignored both and were soon gone.  
Bluefire turned to Chiriko. "What do I mean? Well, ya see, um, never mind, ok? Let's go into the next room."  
"All right."  
As they left, Bluefire pulled a book out of the air. Nuriko caught a glimpse of the title: "The Art Of French Kissing". He started laughing. Bluefire gave him the evil eye.  
Nuriko turned his attention elsewhere.   
"Who votes we re-fangirl KoK?"  
"ME!!!!" shrieked Lily.  
"MEE TOOOOO!!!!" screamed Taira.  
Sano, Kyrssa, and a few others who had felt the psycho-ness looked dubious, but they realized that she would be better off insane. So they cast Koutoku pitying looks and dragged Suboshi across the room.  
Suboshi looked around. "What? What? I want to go! I have some stuff to do!"  
"You're way too young, yoyo boy..." muttered Nuriko.  
Suboshi stuck his tongue out.  
"Childish insult," Nuriko retorted.  
Suboshi pulled out ryuuseisui.  
"I TAKE IT BACK!!!!!" the cross-dresser yelled, "Anyway, we want you to make KoK insane again."  
"NOOOOO!!!" said Shouka, appearing arm in arm with Tomo. "That is my job and my job alone."  
"Okay, okay, sheesh, do it."  
Shouka took KoK and gently pushed her into the next room, Tomo following. Koutoku began to massage his temples.   
"Suzaku spare me..."  
"Now, first, we'll teach you to laugh insanely and squeal like a fangirl."  
"Hm? Okay, if you want me too."  
"We've got a long way to go...."  
Tomoko meanwhile grabbed Suboshi's arm.   
"You said you had something to do?"  
"Yeah, c'mon."  
"All RIGHT!!"  
Suboshi looked at her oddly. She grinned. He shrugged and pulled her out the door.   
"Six down, 18 to go," Keisuke muttered.   
Sano shot him a look.   
"Tatara, what's the trick for growing sunflowers perfectly? I understand that marigolds and chrysanthemums are easy, but how do you work with those?"  
"And how to you put a mirror in a flower and turn it into a seed and stick it in your ear?" murmured Nuriko.  
Taira distracted him by asking Keisuke, "When Miaka hugged Nuri-chan that one time by the pool, when his shirt came off, did she tell you how she got it to do that?"  
Keisuke stared. "I have NO idea, Taira. Ask Miaka."  
"But she's in China on her honeymoon. How'm I supposed to ask her?"  
"I don't KNOW!!!!"   
Tetsuya sniggered. Becki flicked him gently on the nose.  
"Tetsuya-chan, be a little more well mannered please."  
"Ok, Be-cki-ai."  
"Aw, it's cute how you draw out my name like that."  
"Hehe." Tetsuya laughed, sweatdropping.  
  
  
TBC...  
  
As I said, short chapter. I was playing off and had no inspiration, so be glad it came up at all!! ^^------ Darn writers' block. IT'S OTOUTO'S FAULT!!!! EVERYTIME SHE GETS INSPIRATION, I'M HIT WITH.... THE BLOCK(tm)!!!! Ehe. 


	5. People Are Leaving, and Sano Turned Weir...

I'm ba-aaaaaaack!!! More pairing, although this fic is getting long - at least long for me. I tend to do short pieces. And Korin-chan, who is helping me EVER SO SLIGHTLY!! *Ahem* seems to prefer her short miserable things. Buuuuuuuuut, everyone needs to put a little variety in his or her life (I guess) so we'll make long. However, we may be wrapping it up. And Sano, I'll see what I can do...expect to see changes in your personality! ^_~ ------------ (Waen, I quit writing that fic absolutely _ages_ ago!)  
  
  
Nuriko peered anxiously at the door, agitatedly poking it once in a while.  
"Is that necessary?" murmured a new girl, who'd slipped in unnoticed. "It makes me rather uncomfortable."  
"Hn. It's necessary. Who're you?"  
"I'm a Tatara fangirl....."  
"Woohoo," the purple-haired seishi grimaced. "Have fun."  
"What do you mean?"  
Nuriko said nothing, still poking the door. The girl moved to where Tatara stood. He was alone at the moment, because Sano had gone to ask Keisuke something.   
"Heya!!" the girl murmured seductively.  
"I have a girlfriend." Tatara stated. She looked taken aback, then opened her mouth.  
"Yes. Our relationship is perfectly stable. We're going out for diner tonight. I'm sorry, but you and I cannot get together sometime," Tatara cut in. She looked pouty.  
Sano shot across the room. The girl glared.   
"So, YOU'RE the one who stole Tatara-ai from me!" she yelled dramatically  
"I did no such thing!" Sano protested  
"Oh yeah? He was mine before you came along!!!"  
*wham*   
[Insert girl being punched Nuriko-style into the wall]   
"Whoops. Sometimes I forget my own strength," Sano smirked.   
"DISCIPLE!!!" shouted Nuriko, flying over to her  
"Let the fangirl wars begin," grinned Taira.  
Meanwhile Shouka emerged from the room Nuriko had been watching, arm in arm with Tomo, KoK trailing behind.   
"Insane as ordered," she winked at Nuriko. Nuriko, however, was ignoring her, demanding that Sano tell him where she'd learned to punch like that. Eventually she became tired of his hyper begging.   
[Insert Nuriko flying into opposite wall, embedded next to the Tatara fangirl]   
".... Itai...."   
Tatara whistled appreciatively. Sano grinned. Even Nuriko, in his plastered state, managed, "A true Nuriko prototype. If only she liked Heika-sama."  
Sano made a face. "I'm my own person, thank you, no prototype of yours."  
"But.... disciple..."  
[Insert Nuriko, along with most of his wall, flying into the next wall over]   
[Insert Keisuke sobbing about the apartment]   
[Insert Bluefire sticking a tousled head out of the next room long enough to repair the wall] [Insert horrified scream from the bathroom when Nuriko sees his sorry self in the mirror]   
[Insert Taira dashing into the room to comfort him]   
[Insert _distractions_ for Taira, as they are now alone in a room together and she's an insane fangirl]   
KoK stared. "That was effective." *buggy eyes*   
Koutoku grimaced. "Hi KoK."  
"KOU-AIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!" She pounced him.  
"I'm never going to forgive you," Koutoku informed Shouka. She just grinned tauntingly and got out a makeup kit. She and Tomo began to leave, chattering non-stop about clothing stores and makeup styles.   
"Tatara, were you serious about dinner tonight?" asked Sano carefully. "I mean, you weren't just trying to get rid of that insert Tasuki word here?"  
Tatara coughed. "You know, I think this place is a bad influence on you. But yes, I was serious about dinner."  
"WAI!!! Can I go home and get changed first? After all, this outfit has an awful lot of plaster dust on it from *cough*smashingNurikoandthatinsert Tasuki word hereintothewallheehee*cough*"  
"Right, okay, and I'll pick you up in about an hour, ikeru?"  
"Yup!!"   
From the bathroom, Nuriko hollered, "Just like me! Spends a day healthily making people into wall angels and then can think about personal appearance! My double in personality, I tell you!"  
"Healthy, is it?" Sano marched over to the bathroom. "Well, I like to keep in good health - " she stopped mid-sentence, head poked around the doorframe. "-However! There is such thing as being over-healthy!!!" She rushed back to Tatara, and hid behind him. "NO ONE GO IN THERE!!!!!"  
"Dun worry," Koutoku sighed.  
"Becki-ai?"  
"Hai, Tetsuya-chan?"  
"Wanna go out?"   
"Suuuuure!" *gringrin*  
"Jussa minute."  
"What?"  
He pulled her into a fast embrace, managing to kiss her and not have any difficulties with The Sunglasses(tm).   
"Okay, now let's go."  
*bluuuuuuuush* "Whoa, Tetsuya!"  
*wink*   
"QUIT BLUSHING!!!" Nuriko bellowed.  
"You're in another room! How the heck?"   
"I could see it coming!"  
"You're still -"  
"FIGURE OF SPEECH, OKAY???"  
"Got it! You just stay there, have fun, whatever." *thinks of the implications* "Or whatever. Ow. Anyway, let's go, Becki-ai!"  
"I'm with ya!"  
"I'm glad."  
"Kawaii!!"  
"Arigatou!"  
"JUST GET OUT OF HERE!!!!!" Nuriko roared.  
"We're gone!"  
"Right on!"  
"Yup, yup!"  
"I SAID, GO!!"  
"We're going!"  
"Out the door, man!"  
Then, giggling at Nuriko's enraged snorts, they ran out the door to Tetsuya's car. (Does Tetsuya have a car? Oh well, he does now....)  
"Well, I'd better go too, if I wanna be ready for tonight," Sano said, leaving also. Tatara changed his mind at the last second and ran after to escort her to her house.  
"10 down, 14 to go, oh, and we gotta get that Tatara fangirl out of the wall," Keisuke said sunnily, obviously pleased with the way the occupants of his apartment were leaving.  
Tomite slid by with Hoshi, stopping to pick Keisuke's pocket of his car keys.   
"I figure you'd rather drive than walk?" he asked Hoshi.  
"Oh, 'course!" she said, covering her mouth so she wouldn't laugh and alert Keisuke to the fact that something was amiss.  
They breezed out the door, as Keisuke sighed happily, "12 down, 12 to go!" and was whacked gently by Kyrssa,   
"Although I admit it'll be nice to have the apartment to ourselves."  
Taira and Nuriko emerged from the bathroom, slightly flushed. Apparently she hadn't needed Miaka's instruction.   
"Nuri-chan, I get this feeling that my place might be more private..." she said, sweatdropping at all the people staring.  
"Actually, I think you have a point," Nuriko agreed. "Plus we'll be away from the infernal blushing," as he passed Hikitsu and Waen, "You two enjoying yourselves?"  
They were startled out of a deep kiss, blushing furiously.  
"See what I mean?"   
"Got it."  
"My convertible..."  
"OH YEAH!!! I shall be the first fangirl in history to be honored with a ride in The Convertible!!!!"  
"Actually," Keisuke remarked, "I used it to drive Maze here from the airport. I wonder if she and Chichiri went to a hotel? She lives in America..."  
"WHAT??? YOU CONTAMINATED THE CONVERTIBLE??? YOU LET SOMEONE ELSE RIDE IN IT, SOMEONE WHO WASN'T A TRUE DEDICATED NURIKO FANGIRL?????"  
"Sorry," Keisuke cowered under the girl's rage.  
  
TBC...  
  
Ahh, the cast is trailing off. But we still have unwanted seishi and some folks left to keep up the amusement. See y'all next chapter, and I hope that you like yourself, Sano. Love and kisses to all my reviewers and fellow fangirls,  
  
~KoK 


	6. Short Chapter Because of the Bloody Writ...

More-ness! By the way, thanks Sano, poor Mits was feeling awful. Sorry, but as one of my reviewers kindly pointed out, this story has no plot whatsoever. (Not that it was supposed to)   
So I've decided to dedicate it to all the people who's stories have plot! Purple Mouse and "Another Story", TA Maxwell and "Daughter of Suzaku", ASHERBOB and "All the Seiryuu Have Mental Problems", Skipsida and "What About...", BloodyCrystal-Snowdancer and "Walking Down the Path of Destiny: A Barrier of Ice", Bluefire and "SUBARUUUUU", and many, many more. (I love you people's stories! Love them I tell you! Um.... that list is looooong) The chapter, however, is short.  
  
Keisuke hid under a chair.   
"She's scary!!!"  
"SCARY AM I??? WELL IN LIGHT OF WHAT YOU DID-"  
"Taira?"  
"Hai?"  
"I rather think it would be better if we just went home and continued from where we left off."  
"Oh, YES, Nuriko-sama!! Let's go!" Taira sprang up and dashed out the door, calling a quick "sorry" to Keisuke, with Nuriko running after, eager to be close to, not his girl, but - his car. (Poor disillusioned Taira.)   
Keisuke stared and then thought of something. He called out to one of the unwanted seishi, "Nakago? Do me a favor and see how Bluefire and Chiriko are doing, okay?"  
"Do I haaaaaaaave to?" the shogun whined.   
"Yes! Get over there!"   
Nakago reluctantly walked to the door of the couple's room, and looked in. His eyes bugged.   
"I-I-I didn't realize it was possible to do that..............."   
Bluefire looked up. "What are you DOING IN HERE!?!? OUT!!"   
"Keisuke made me!!!" The man backtracked quickly. "Sweet Seiryuu, Keisuke, I don't believe it! I thought that Chiriko was supposed to be the innocent one..."  
Keisuke sweatdropped. "What are they doing, Nakago?"  
"How about we leave that up to the readers? This is supposed to be a PG rated fic, ya know. Just remember, it scared ME!!"  
"But you're a wimp, Naka-baka," said a voice from the door, where Taka and his young bride stood. "Hi everyone, Tama's back!"  
"......Taka?"  
"Yeah?"  
"You just called yourself 'Tama'..."  
"OH MY SWEET SUZAKU!!!!" Taka fainted.  
Mitsukake looked up. "Does he need to be healed?"  
"Even if he does, who cares? Hold me, Mits!" A fangirl leapt into the healer's arms.   
"Sweet Suzaku."  
"Mitsukake!"  
"Hello."  
"Hi!!" she said hyperly, "I'm Juufan!!"   
"How are you?"  
"High!! How 'bout you?"  
Mitsukake blinked.   
"Do you need anybody? You just need someone to love!" she sang.   
The melancholy healer guy was not used to having a fan. It was a new feeling. But this fan seemed nice, even if she was a bit...insane.   
"Do you love me?" she asked.  
"Um..."  
Suddenly she was wearing a Shouka (this being the real one) outfit. She grinned. "Say yes!"  
"Yes?"  
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!!!"  
Mitsukake smiled. Maybe he had needed someone. Perhaps he had spent too long dwelling on Shouka's memory. Okay then.  
"Where would you like to eat tonight?" he said suavely.  
Half the cast fainted. Mitsukake??? Acting worthy of the leading male role in some romance novel?? WOW!!"  
Juufan gave him starry eyes. "How about Sapporo's?" (Okay, this is a Japanese restaurant near where I live, it's a really fancy one, so we only go on special occasions, but SUZAKU!! They serve great teriyaki!! *swoons*)   
"Sure, baby. What you want I'm happy to give."  
"Whoo!!" Juufan grinned.  
"Oh my DAMN SWEET SUZAKU!!" Tasuki fainted.   
"Gee, everyone's fainting!" Miaka said in her usual hyper way, "Onii-chan, is there anything to eat?"  
"No." Keisuke stated. "We've had a lot of guests today."  
"Hey, yeah! You're right! Hiiii Hikitsu!"  
Hikitsu jumped. "Gyahhhh!! Oh, hi, Miaka. How are you?"  
"Greeeeat!! Who's your girlfriend?"  
"She's not - guess there's no point in denying it..."  
"Especially not when you're hanging off each other and you've been in a curtain kissing for the past half-hour," Keisuke informed him.  
Hikitsu's face turned red.   
"QUIT BLUSHING!!!!!!!!!" The phone fell out of its holder as Nuriko's voice blasted out of the speaker.  
"How the heck do you do that?"   
"I have power," the phone told them smugly.  
"DIE EVIL CREATURE!!!!!" Nakago slammed it back into place, cutting Nuriko off.  
"Well, that was a bit of an outburst....but I rather agree."  
  
TBC....  
  
Yes, this chapter was VERY short. I know. I don't care!!! There are only two more chapters left. I have this bloody writers' block so badly I may go insane. If you complain you shall perish, like instantly!!! I cannot write when I have bloody writers' block, and I won't! GAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!! *Buries head in hands* 


	7. In Which the Last People Are Gotten Out ...

Oh, when I dedicated the last chapter, I forgot Juufan's Star of Hope and Destiny! Great story, Juufan!! Keep it up! I also forgot Chibigreen Tanuki's Tears of a Phoenix! I LOVE that story!!  
I'm tentative about how well I've broken my bloody writers' block, so be patient with me!  
  
  
"Okay, Gayboy is really getting to me about now, so I think we're going to leave!" Tasuki grabbed Hidemi's hand and raced from the room.   
The phone flew out of its holder again as Nuriko's voice yelled: "I AM PERFECTLY STRAIGHT, MY GIRLFRIEND IS IN THE APARTMENT WITH ME, AND WE'RE - neeeeevermind."  
"GAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Nakago slammed the phone back again. "He's evil!! He's hunting us!! Keisuke, cut the wires! Do something!!" he pleaded.  
"Um...I might feel the need to do that sometime soon," Keisuke mused.  
"Please do so," Hikitsu urged, "I feel we don't have very much privacy right now."  
"No, you don't," the phone told them.  
"Stooooooooop!!!!" Nakago wailed.  
"No," the phone said  
Nakago began to cry. Everyone in the apartment stared. Mitsukake sidled out the door with his Juufan. "Come on, baby, that romantic evening awaits."  
"Mitsukake-ai!" She swooned.  
They were soon gone. Keisuke began to gleefully count the people left in the room. "Okay, we're got Nakago, Miboshi, Ashitare - ASHITARE!!!"  
"Sorry," the werewolf replied, taking off the apron and moving away from the stove where he was making cream of salmon and leek soup.  
"Oh, well, if you were that far, you can continue."  
"Roger!" He saluted and got the apron out again, and began to stir the soup.   
"Anyway, we also have to get the Tatara fangirl out of the wall. And then we've got Hikitsu, Waen, KoK, Koutoku, Chiriko, and Bluefire. Excellent. Only 10 more people to go!"  
"And then we'll be alone." Kryssa grinned.  
"Precisely," he grinned back.  
Bluefire popped her head out of the room. "Hey, guys?"  
"Yes? Oh, Bluefire, are you almost done in there? If people don't leave soon, Kryssa and I are going to need it."  
"That's what I was gonna say. We're thinking of heading home. It's getting late." She gave him a wicked grin.  
"Yeeeahh, all right, you go then." Behind his hand he told Nakago, "You know, I think you were right to be scared. Sorry I laughed at you."  
"That's okay," Nakago said, staring wide-eyed at Bluefire, an expression of terror on his face.  
"Awww, cut it out!" Taka, who had mysteriously revived, said cheerfully, "I'm quite sure you did worse with Soi!"  
Nakago flushed.  
Everybody looked at one another.  
"All together now! - "  
"QUIT BLUSHING!!!!" Everyone yelled along with the phone, which flung itself violently out of the holder as the voice echoed from it.  
They then proceeded to pounce on the phone and destroy it as much as possible. But still Nuriko's voice came, "Quit trying to silence me. I am the voice of doom."  
"Damn straight," Taka said.  
Nakago whimpered.  
Hikitsu and Waen looked at one another, and then said simultaneously: "I thought it was Tasuki with the dirty mouth." They grinned, then continued synchronized: "We're going riding now, we'll see you sometime soon, I guess. Wish us luck."  
"I will, if riding is actually what you plan on doing. And if it's not, I still wish you luck."  
"KOK!!!" Waen cried indignantly.  
"Please!" Hikitsu added.  
"Well, after the curtain, you could expect me being a bit suspicious!" KoK announced self-righteously.   
"KoK?" Koutoku said quietly.  
"Yes?"  
"Look, all things aside, just wish them luck, and let's go out to dinner."  
"All right. Thanks Kou-ai. Good luck, Obake-chan."  
"Same to you."  
"And you, Bluey."  
"Yes, good luck to you, Bluefire."  
"You too, KoK, Waen."  
With that, Waen and Hikitsu (with lead ropes in hand), Koutoku and KoK (riding piggyback), and Bluefire and Chiriko (walking/hugging and saying goodbye/kissing) all went out the door.  
"Bye, guys!!! See you at the weddings!"  
"Same for you!"  
"Best of luck!"  
"Many children!"  
"Shut up, you hentai."  
Then Taka and Miaka left for their apartment.  
"See ya round, guys!!"  
"We'll come by tomorrow."  
"Okay, see ya then."  
"Best wishes."  
"For you as well!"  
"Sayonara!"  
"Sayonara!"  
When they were out of sight, Keisuke turned to Ashitare, Nakago, and Miboshi.  
"Look, you guys, I dunno what we're going to do with you."  
"Don't worry about me, chaps! I'll be your housekeeper and cook!" Ashitare offered.   
Dubious as they were about having a werewolf for a housekeeper/cook, Keisuke and Kryssa agreed when they smelled the aroma of the cream of salmon and leek soup.  
"You're hired!" they cried together.  
"Why thank you. And may I use your computer to find a dating site and get dates for Nakkie here, and Miboshi?"  
"Of course, thank you."  
Ashitare went back to his soup happily, and Miboshi and Nakago went to work out the mysteries of the computer.  
Then Kryssa and Keisuke looked at each other, and went to the car to drive to the church.   
It was then that they noticed the loss of the car keys. (Remember that Tomite had "borrowed" them earlier. :))   
"GAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"   
"Oh well," Kryssa sighed. She kissed Keisuke gently.  
He blushed.  
"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO DO THIS?????????" Nuriko's voice blasted from the house. Trees fell over. Rose bushes died. People fainted. Cats had seizures.   
And the car was blown clear to the church.  
"Yuuki Keisuke, do you take this woman to be your lawful wedded wife?"  
"I do."  
"Touma Kryssa, do you take this man to be your lawful wedded husband?"  
"I do."  
"You may now kiss the bride.  
  
TBC...  
  
Yes, there is one more chapter! Please stay tuned. It takes place about a year later. If anybody would like to say how many kids they want (one, twins, triplets, etc.) and the names they would like used for these children, please include in your review. And please do review, to inspire me for the next installation of Wanted: Fans.  
~KoK 


	8. IMPORTANT NOTICE!

IMPORTANT NOTICE!!!! PLEASE READ!!!!!  
  
Sorry for my stupidity, but the next chapter takes place about 6 years later!! Not one year. My bad. Anyway, please edit you decisions if you want children: the names, gender, age, how many you want, etc...   
Sorry about my mistake, and please review with child information.   
Luv ya all, fellow fangirls and reviewers!  
~KoK (no baka)  
KoK: What'd you just type, Ko-chan?"  
Korin: Oh, nothing! Heh, that'll teach her to say I'm no help! *shoots irritated look at KoK*  
KoK: O! I am slain! I've been shot by an irritated look!  
Korin: -_- Creature. 


	9. In Which It Ends, And Suboshi Gets To Dr...

Finally! I return!! (I was on Christmas Vacation) I faced the worst torture known to woman!! A ten-year-old boy obsessed with Star Wars! *groan* And I want someone to tell me where he learned that language! He's not supposed to know words like that! But now, I am safe, back, and ready to complete my little gem *pats computer with story on screen* Be prepared for the end! And some really odd children! If you didn't give information about kids, I'm doing it myself. And it's your own fault if you don't like. *sticks out tongue* Oh, one last thing. Everyone appears to be the same age. I don't know why, I guess I just didn't feel like aging anyone. *sigh* That's me! (Waen, you don't want to hear this story! It's totally angst-filled!!)  
  
  
"Come in, come in," Taka opened the door as Shouka and Tomo came in, with a little boy in her arms, and two girls trailing behind.   
"This is Aki, the oldest, and Shetan, she's the middle child, and he's Keiichi. My little Keiichi," she cooed. Tomo did a 'proud father' pose. Taka grinned.   
"They'll have lots of kids their ages to play with. Lots of folks are here already."  
"Gotcha. And we brought a pecan pie for our covered dish, okay?"  
"Yup. Put it on the table over there."  
"Lord, there's a lot of food. How're we gonna eat it all?"   
Just then Miaka popped up, with two kids in hand. "Hiiiiiii!!!!"  
"Oh, I see."  
"This is Mochi, and Nashi."   
"Uh-huhhh."  
Taka blushed. "It was her idea!"  
"What's wrong?" Miaka asked.  
"I was sort of wondering why you named your kids "Mochi" and "Nashi"[1], that's all."  
"They're so cute and the names fit them!" Miaka declared happily.  
"Oh boy."  
"SHOUK!!!! Hiiiiiiiii!!!!!!" KoK rushed across the room to her. "I've missed you! It's great to see you again!" She wrung Shouka's hand excitedly. "Are these your kids? They're adorable! You guys are just such a great family!"  
"Great?" muttered Taka, "With Tomo as father?"  
"HEY!"   
"Anyway, Taira's here already, and Waen, and Tomoko and Maze! There are still some people to come!" She turned to Taka. "It was such a great idea to have a surprise party for Keisuke and Kryssa!"  
"Thank you, but be that as it may, we'd better hope that the rest of the guests show up before they get back. We don't want the surprise ruined."  
"Right, right!"  
"Mama, Nobuyuki says he's named after one of the characters in Aunt Waen's anime. Is that right?" A small boy had come up to KoK  
"Yep! Nobuyuki is the archer," she told him, grinning.  
The boy's twin jumped up behind him. "I was right! Nobuyuki is the coolest character anyway!"  
"Yeah, but I'm named after a famous seiyuu, right?"  
"I wouldn't say famous, but yeah, that's right, Yuuji. He's also my favorite singer."  
"They yours?"  
"You got it. They have Kou-ai's good looks!"  
Koutoku looked pleased and flattered. "Why thank you, KoK."  
"How is Waen?" Shouka asked.  
"Don't ask." KoK closed her eyes. "Blurg. I think Les Miserables had a very interesting effect on her."  
Waen appeared at that moment, with a small boy in her arms. "Hi, Shouka! Haven't seen you in a while! This is Briar."  
"There's no Briar in Les Mis," said Becki, confused. She had just come up behind them.  
"Oh, Gavroche is over there," she gestured to a group of children which by now contained KoK's sons, Waen's Gavroche, Shouka's Aki, Taira's Murasaki and several unknown little ones.  
"Ah, I understand. See the little boy with Yuuji? The one with chestnut coloured hair? That's my Syaoran."   
"Aww, he's adorable! His eyes are so sparkly!" KoK announced.   
"Keisuke's got Moi, because she's only two months, and he's taking her to Ashitare. He volunteered to take care of the littlest ones, like Taira's daughter."  
"Taira has a daughter?"  
"Yes, her name is Chika."  
KoK grinned. "There is no way in Shi Jin Ten Chi Sho that's a coincidence."  
"Nope."  
"Oh, hi Maze!"  
"Hello!" Maze and Chichiri were watching their 3-year-old daughter, Kouran, who was deep in some game with Hidemi's Natsume.  
"What're they playing?"  
Maze smiled. "I think it's a discussion on the cost of M&Ms, in which they use real ones."  
"Looks like Hidemi's passed her habits on to her children."  
"It would seem so."  
"How was the wedding?"  
"It was wonderful! KoK scared everyone though."  
"That's very like her. What happened?"  
Chichiri laughed. "The Nyan-nyans started to bother her no da."  
"Oh lord."  
"That's about right no da. It quieted down soon however no da. And the ceremony went perfectly no da."  
"He's just saying that because he got to conduct it." Maze said in an exaggerated whisper to Shouka.  
"Ashitare, what ARE you doing?"  
The werewolf sighed and looked up from where he was giving several tiny children a piggyback ride. Shouka had to work hard not to burst out laughing. He gave her a long-suffering look.   
"Fun," the three-month-old Kojiro pronounced. Hidemi ran to him, gushing.  
"That's his very first word!"  
Bluefire's Kin (pronounced keen) stared at Tomoko's twins Touka and Sumire. "Our parents are so weird."  
"You're right, you know."  
"They are weird."  
"They make such a big deal out of us talking."  
"I don't get it."  
They shrugged, and Sumire, using telekinesis, removed three cookies from the refreshments table. He passed them around the small circle.   
"They may be weird, but most of them cook pretty well, right?"  
"Right!"  
  
Meanwhile...  
  
"Renko! Keiko! What're you doing?"  
They both blinked innocently and stopped laughing. "Nothin'," Renko murmured.   
"Watchin' Onii-chan."   
"Why, what's Syaoran doing?"  
Renko pointed a small chubby baby hand at Syaoran, who was standing on his head. Keiichi was balanced on his feet, smiling cutely from his perch and holding a little orchid in his hand. Becki's eyes widened.   
"I hope they're careful. I'm sure we don't want to kill any of you little ones."  
"They are! They've been practicing."  
"They won't die."  
"Immensely cheerful, you are," said a voice from behind them.   
Becki did not even turn around. "Children being rather stressful, Sano?"  
"A bit, yes." The small, flower-like (but still very tough) young woman disentangled a child from her hair.   
"Ashitare is taking care of some of them."  
"Oh, I seriously doubt if Kasaru or Shushi will ever be detached from me." She pulled the little girl with green hair off her shoulder and set her on the floor. Large brown eyes stared up at her. "Oh, Byakko, you're too cute. Stop. Make yourself uncute." She sighed and picked the girl back up. "All right, all right. Hmm, I wonder how your father is dealing with Kasaru?"  
"He's probably have an awful time," Shushi decided. "Kasaru doesn't like plants. Why not, mama? Everyone else in our family does."  
"He was switched at birth. Your lovely older brother who adores plants as his blood family is somewhere in Bosnia, whilst we deal with this cops-and-robbers child. I'm sure that's the answer." She laughed, and tickled Shushi's ear.  
"Really?"  
"No, I was kidding. I don't know why."  
Becki grinned. "When do you think Hoshi and Tomite will be here? We're missing them, and Juufan's bunch, isn't that right?"  
"Konninichiwa, minna-san!"  
"Speak of the devils!"  
Hoshi, Tomite, and Yuki came in the door. Hoshi deposited a large dish of chicken teriyaki on the sideboard, and Yuki rushed to Uta.   
"Uta-chan!"  
"Yuki-chan!"  
They hugged.   
"I missed you!"  
"I missed you too!"  
"I bought you a gift, Yuki."  
"Hm?"  
"See what you think." He pulled a thin gold chain from his pocket. Hung on it was a tiny silver snowflake, done with such care that it was a miniature wonder. He carefully placed it around her neck and fastened the clasp.  
"Uta, it's beautiful!!"   
*blush* "Thanks."  
"I still think that they're too young to be truly in love," Tomite remarked.  
"Ever read "The Golden Compass" series by Philip Pullman?" Sano questioned. "They're not too young."  
"Hn."  
Hoshi smiled. "I think they're adorable."  
"We'll be at a wedding ceremony before they're 7, mark my words."  
"Yeah, yeah."  
"Hey, guys!"  
"Hi Juufan!"  
"Ahh, it's the Juu Bunch!"  
Mitsukake and his wife smiled at the comment, then looked proudly at their family of five. Five who were all perfectly identical. Quintuplets, in fact.  
"Okay, Hi (pronounced Hee), Kouji, Yuuhi, Arashi, and Tsuki, show Taka what you made." She added to Taka, "They love to cook, so they all brought something they did on their own!"  
"Yeah..." Taka sweatdropped as Miaka ran to the kids, gushing:  
"You can cook? All right, all RIGHT!! Man, you kids are just awesome! Totally great!"  
"I made dumplings!" Hi held up her offering. Miaka quickly relieved her of it.   
"They look fantastic! Hi, you're just the absolute best!!"  
Hi blushed, and Yuuhi nudged her aside to present his dish to Miaka. "Cherry-blossom Mochi!"  
Miaka looked very thrilled as she told Mochi, "Look, they're named after you! Isn't that kid great?" Mochi nodded, removing one from the plate.   
"Takes after her mother," Taka muttered.   
Arashi made okonomiyaki, Kouji did sake with herbs, and Tsuki gave Miaka homemade raman. Miaka quickly decided that she loved all of Juufan's many children.  
  
Meanwhile...  
  
"Nuriko says no one underage can drink."  
"What? Really?"  
"Yeah."  
"But that's not fair! I mean, come on! My dear sake, and all."  
"You don't drink sake."  
"Of course I do. Japanese children are raised on sake."  
"Yeah, okay then. I dare you to get some kind of alcohol from Nuriko, or Taka."  
"All right, I'll take you up. What'll you give me if I win?"  
"If you win, you're getting the booze after all."  
"All righty. Wish me luck."  
  
So you can guess that...  
  
Suboshi sprinted over to Nuriko, and collapsed on the floor, clutching his throat. "Dying...of thirst!"  
Nuriko raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?"  
*gasp* "Yes...so... *choke* thirsty..." He made a few exaggerated dying noises. "Hey, I'd better get an Oscar for this."  
"If you're really that thirsty, what do you want?"  
"Uokka? [2]" Suboshi suggested.  
"You're kidding me, right?"  
"Not really."  
"YOYO-BOY!!! YOU'RE UNDERAGE!!!!!!!"  
"Am not."  
"You're fifteen."  
"Yeah, but if the authoress felt like making us the right ages, I'd be twenty-one, and that'd make it legal."  
"That changes nothing. Do not attempt to smuggle a drink."  
"I'll get you the tessen and make it so you can fry Tasuki with it."  
"Would that be Uokka or a martini?"   
"Thanks." Suboshi ran back over to Tomoko, and offered her the glass. "Did it."  
"Yeah, but what about the tessen?"  
"Oh, that. Just a sec." He flew over to the pyromaniac. "Hey, Tasuki, can I borrow your tessen?"  
"What for?"  
"I wanna use it on Tama-boy."  
"Here ya go. Return it then!!!"  
Suboshi chose not to answer as he dashed back to Nuriko and gave him the tessen. "Oh, wait." He took it back, moved to Taka, 'Lekka Shin'en-d' him, and then appeared at the cross-dresser's side to return the weapon. "Here you are, as promised." Nuriko ruffled his hair, as he returned to Tomoko.   
  
Thus...  
  
"There, you see?"  
"Yep, you win. Poor Tasuki got the worst end of the bargain."  
"Heh. Have you any idea what he's doing to aniki's family?" [3]  
"No. Do I want to know?"  
"Nope. All I can say is, he deserves it."  
"Right then. I refuse to get involved."  
"Don't worry, I'll make sure no one gets you into it. They do like using you as the peacemaker, don't they?"  
  
At the same time...  
  
"Chichiri, isn't this just great?"  
"Yeah no da! I'm so happy now no da."  
"Come over here, Kouran."  
Kouran ran to her mother, and was gathered up into loving arms, and then squashed between Chichiri and Maze as they kissed.   
"The world's just full of happy couples, isn't it?" Nuriko popped up.  
"Gah! Nuriko!"  
"Nuriko no da! Quit doing that no da!"  
"Yesss, Nuriko, we already know Keisuke has a spare room. Why don't you and Taira go hang out?"  
"Maybe because Keisuke just arrived?"  
"What no da?!"  
"Yep."  
They ran to greet Keisuke and Kryssa, who had just avoided simultaneous heart failure.  
"Hi everybody!"  
"Keisuke, Kryssa, did you like the surprise?"  
"Yeah, Miaka, it was indeed a surprise.  
"And these must be your kids."  
"Well, they're the newest ones, and they're the ones clinging to me, Nuriko. This is Ayame and Isaya."  
"Adorable!!" Nuriko huggled them. "Hi girls!! You're just the cutest!"   
Taira whacked him. "What about our kids?"  
"Except for Murasaki, Chika, Tenbun and Taira."  
"Good boy, girl, or whatever."  
"Heh."  
"So, guys, are we gonna eat now??" Miaka demanded.  
"No, Miaka, what gave you that idea? We don't plan on eating at all."  
"WHAT?????!!!!!"  
"I was kidding, Miaka-chan."  
"Oh."  
"ITADAKIMASU!!!!" Nuriko declared, speeding past her to the loaded sideboard. She raced after him.  
"Good, eh?" he remarked as she buried her face in a pile of whipped cream and chocolate.  
"'Erry 'oo'," she announced  
"Baka," Keisuke sighed, walking past, and getting plates for Kryssa and himself.  
Kryssa grinned and walked over to put her arms around his waist and rest her head on his shoulder. "Isn't this fun? A party just for us."  
"Yeah, and since you came into my life it's much the better."  
"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww," Nuriko said, coming up behind them.  
"Do you mind? You're spoiling the scene."  
"Fine, I know when I'm not wanted, I'm going to glomp my wife!" Nuriko moved to Taira's side to sweep her into a hug, and whirl her around the room, ignoring the fact that the mochi in her hand left its place and went to hit the wall.   
"Our folks are _really_ weird!" Kin sighed, as all around the room couples began kissing or embracing.  
"Don't worry," Sumire told him, "Apparently they get worse." And with a grin he whapped his sister and began to lead the children in a terribly destructive game of tag...  
  
THE END!!!!!!  
  
Boy, this has been a fun story! Cheers to all, and enjoy your kids, who are now copyright of their parents! You can use them in any fics of yours. I feel bad it's at an end, but I hope everyone enjoyed it as much as me. Happy New Year, minna!!!  
  
Note to Taira: Are you impressed with my shooting-star plumb-bob?  
Note to Maze: I still can't thank you enough for FnK  
  
BAI-BAI MINNA-SAN!!!!  
~KoK  
  
[1] Guide to Children's Names:  
  
Miaka's Mochi: Mochi means "Rice Cake". I thought it would be fun to name her kids after foods.  
Miaka's Nashi: Nashi means "Pear"  
Shouka's Aki: Aki means "Autumn"  
Waen's Gavroche: Gavroche is character from Les Miserables (Waen's favorite character, it happens.)  
Taira's Murasaki: Murasaki means "Purple"  
Hidemi's Kojiro: Kojiro was James' (from Pokemon) original name  
Bluefire's Kin: Kin means "Gold"   
Tomoko's Sumire: Sumire means "Violet". He's also a character from Waen's anime.  
Tomoko's Touka: Touka means "Peach blossom"  
Sano's Shushi: Shushi means "Seed"  
Hoshi's Yuki: Yuki means "Snow"  
Bluefire's Uta: Uta means "Song"  
Juufan's Hi: Hi means "Day"  
Juufan's Kouji: Kouji is the name of Mitsukake's seiyuu  
Juufan's Yuuhi: Yuuhi means "Sun"  
Juufan's Arashi: Arashi means "Storm"  
Juufan's Tsuki: Tsuki means "Moon"  
Taira's Tenbun: Tenbun is a character from Yukiyasha Den, and she really likes him apparently.  
  
[2] Uokka is Japanese for Vodka, which I thought would be amusing for Sushi-boy to ask for.  
  
[3] Shouka and I are writing a story (which we don't plan on posting), and Tasuki is terrorizing Amiboshi's child. I mean really terrorizing him. I mean, really, REALLY - okay, I'll shut up... 


End file.
